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Category: Transgender Body & Soul
Today our newest contributor Julie Slowinski writes about her first time out. It happened on a business trip that coincided with the LGBT friendly event, the Seattle International Film Festival. How could she not attend in her feminine finest? She brought enough clothes to provide outfits for every night, and she visited a thrift shop after she arrived, just to make sure had choices. She had everything planned but as so often happens, there were glitches. It all has a happy ending though so don’t be afraid to read about Julie’s first nights out.
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Narcissists prey on other people using manipulative techniques to get praise for themselves and delight at causing their prey to suffer. Transgender people should be aware of these tactics because transgender people, like most people, look to others for understanding and empathy but transgender people are especially vulnerable since tolerance and understanding are not always easy to come by. Today Dr. Dana Bevan shares her research into narcissism and how to deal with them at all levels.
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The only constant in our universe is constant change. Sophie Lynne has moved to central Pennsylvania to attend graduate school at the Pennsylvania State University. Now she is near to her beloved Nittany Lion and attending classes with people much younger than her. Moving back after so many years away has shown her how the place has changed. The Old College Diner is gone. High rise apartment buildings have sprouted everywhere, and many of the businesses that were there 30 years ago are long gone. Come along on Sophie’s journey to an old place from her past life that is now shiny and new.
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Our correspondent in Columbia, Katherine Diaz, has submitted a blog and video and we present the original Spanish text as well as a somewhat inadequate translation into English by a machine. Google Translate. We surmise from Googles efforts that the blog concerns the progress of research into transgender issues as they relate to “queer theory” in Latin America. If you have questions you can contact Katherine through TGF.
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Violence against trans women isn’t just something that happens somewhere else. It can happen anywhere. Claire Hall learned that recently when a newly transitioning woman used the restroom facility at a park in Oregon and was attacked by another woman’s husband. The assailant beat her severely just because she was in the lady’s restroom with his wife. But out of this horrible hate crime came a wave of love that may be helpful in stopping this kind of violence.
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Join Abbey the Cabbie on the mean streets of Charm City. She’s a lady cab driver behind the wheel of her Road King hack. All night she makes the rounds and picks up fares to make some cash. She’d like to give up driving and concentrate on her first love, detective work. She knows she has what it takes to be a good gumshoe but it just don’t seem that she’s gonna get a break. It’s a man’s world. So around the town she goes. Every night out on the streets in her cab. It might drive some people to drink but not Abbey. No. No drinking and driving. That’s rule one.
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Would a rose smell as sweet if it was called a transvestite, a crossdresser, or a transgender person? That’s silly of course but despite the many labels we’ve had for the transgender community all of us knew, some very early and some much later, that we needed something more than living every day in the gender assigned by our birth genitals. Pauline Estelle looks at the many labels from a crossdresser perspective and has an anser to the question, What’s in a Name?
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She called this post “Movin’ on Up” but she hasn’t gone to the east side. Our long-time contributor Sophie Lynne has moved to the center of Pennsylvania to become a schoolgirl, again. She is enrolled at Penn State University in the graduate program. Today she shares her first dispatch from the hallowed halls of academe. Don’t miss the first of her PSU blogs.
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As the summer winds down some of Lynda Martini’s social whirl slows and she takes time in this post to look back over how she started her transgender journey. As in many tales of the transgendered Lynda’s begins when her marriage ends. Then, on her own, she began to dress up at home. After doing that for awhile she realized she needed to go further. As in out the door and into the world.
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Out correspondent in Columbia, Katherine Diaz, writes about her progress from a closeted crossdresser to a life that includes doing performances at nightclubs, lip-syncing and dancing for the crowds. Like many young people when she was young she was attracted to girls and she wanted to be able to look like one. Like many she also waited until she was in her 30s to take those first steps. Read about how she got to where she is and view her video in Princesses of the Night.
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Claire Hall writes about what it was like when she came out. Social media wasn’t that much of a factor for her at first. The web helped her find a support group that wasn’t too far from her home and after attending some meetings she got a few Facebook friends in the trans community. Then the government signaled that things were going to get tougher for transgender people in the USA and Claire’s friend requests jumped. And the people who have connected with her all have stories to tell. Some heartbreaking and some inspiring. So has social media been a help on her journey? Read on.
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Back in the late 1990s TGForum had a couple who contributed to our content. Vanessa, the crossdresser, and Linda, her partner. They wrote separately and together. A topic they always returned to was couples issues. One of the issues was sex. Many times women look at a crossdressing lover as something to put up with. They may not even want to see their man dressed in women’s clothes, let alone make love with him while he is en femme. Linda Kaye was concerned about what sex would be like with Vanessa. Sex with his male self was great but Linda was dreading the first time with Vanessa. Then Vanessa entered the bedroom and Linda forgot about her concerns. From 1997 we bring you this article from the TGF Archives, I Like It!
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After a long sojourn in California Amanda is back on the East Coast. She stopped in her home town in Western Pennsylvania and then went on to Baltimore where she has lodgings with a friend and drives for Lyft. While she was in California she felt that the area she was in was beautiful but there was something wrong. She had anxiety attacks that were crippling. She felt that it might help to return to the east. Now she is in Baltimore and while things have improved she is still subject to anxiety. She wonders if California was only partly to blame for her condition and if perhaps it is her estrogen that is the culprit.
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Like many in the trans community, when Sophie’s need to express her feminine nature finally pushed her to begin exploration of her desires she found that the box in the basement labelled “boxed games” was no longer going to hold the things related to becoming Sophie. For one thing she felt a constant concern that the box would, for some unexplained reason, be opened by someone she didn’t want learning what was inside, and for another thing her latest purchase, a large pair of silicone breast forms, would not even fit inside the box. So she took the next step — renting a storage space. Today she writes about bidding that space goodbye, as she moves on in life.
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Many crossdressers give up dressing in the summer months due to family obligations, cookouts, trips, etc. where shave legs or arms would be noticed and commented on. For some though putting aside feminine dressing is unthinkable. If you’re one of those who simply must enjoy the pleasure of summer femme fashion then Pauline Estelle has a few tips on how to be comfortable and show off your feminine side in the summer months.
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Katherine Diaz is our correspondent in Bogota, Columbia. She considers her crossdressing, as many of us might, as an art. To emulate a woman in all ways takes dedication and several skills. Katherine has been working on improving her skills and is performing on stage in various shows around the city. She has also been chosen to represent the crossdressing and trans community in meetings with the Secretary of Culture, Recreation and Sports, a city agency that promotes “interculturality.” As always, she provides a video and a blog which is in both English and Spanish.
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Claire Hall counts herself as lucky as she was able to transition from male to female, keep her job and most of her friends and associates. But she realizes that it’s not that easy for many people and while transition might be the difference between living and dying, transition might also be a death sentence for some. For others it could at least lead to a more miserable existence. It all leads her to ask is being transgender a blessing or a curse?
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On the 500th episode of Realtime with Bill Maher on HBO one of Maher’s guests was a woman named Debra Soh. Dr. Soh holds a Ph.D. and was on the program to talk about transgender issues. Her statements on the subject seemed to be based in right wing politics rather than in any actual scientific research and she led Maher to believe she was the victim of academic discrimination by academics who wished to promote their theories about transgender people. She said she was accused of being “politically incorrect.” Today Dana Bevan looks at Dr. Soh and her statement about transgender people. Dana finds that Dr. Soh is just the latest in a long line of people who want the world to see trans phenomena their way.
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Amanda may have found her mellow spot. After coming pretty close to rock bottom she has been lifted up again by Lyft. The ride sharing app has allowed her to make money doing something she loves, driving. She is all over the Baltimore area and even down in Virginia and Washington D. C. And she has a new therapist, is getting caught up on her bills and she tells you all about things today. And, she has a small slideshow of the amazing photos she takes while she drives around.
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The only constant in life is constant change. Our Sophie Lynne had one idea for this blog and then in a moment that idea got pared down to only one part of her blog. Another section was necessary due to news she got about the passing of a friend in the community. Then she ends her blog today with some good news. You may want to read it all the way to the end and use the comment area to congratulate her.
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Lynda goes to a mainstream charity gala, reports on her online dating experiment, and updates us on what she’s reading. She also tells you what her favorite new sport is. Hint: It’s one that allows the wearing of a very short skirt. She also wears a beautiful gown. What has she been up to? Dig into Lynda’s adventures for the past few weeks in The Secret Diary of a Transgender Woman.
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Today Claire wonders how other people who have transitioned remember or thing about their former gender-selves. Do they never want to think about that missing person? Are they willing to talk to friends they have maintained through the change about the person they used to be? Claire knows how she answers those questions. Give her blog a read to see how she deals with the missing man.
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Back in 1998 TGForum contributor Leah MacLean wrote about returning from the Fall Harvest transgender gathering in Minneapolis. Her drive, done while still en femme and feeling good, took her through southern Minnesota as she cruised back to her home in Nebraska. Eventually she had to stop for fuel and a restroom break. She pulled in at a gas station located in a place called Crystal Lake. How did that go over with the locals? Read on and find out.
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Transgender people have existed throughout history and are best helped with love and encouragement, not through oppression. Dana Bevan writes an open letter to the Catholic Church advising it to stop treating transgender people as if they were part of some fashion trend and to accept that they exist and they are not sinners. She calls for evidence based policies about transgender issues, not the adoption of the hardline rule that men are men and women are women, as is taught in Abrahamic religious doctrine.
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Often members of the transgender community stay defensive when they are out and about with the general public. That’s one reason support groups and trans specific parties and events are popular. It’s a chance to be among others who are living the same reality and relax without fear that someone will attack them for being who they are. Our blogger Sophie Lynne is an amateur actress who has appeared in a few of her local theatrical troupe’s productions. Just last week she made her debut as a character in A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum. After the play premier she and the cast did what actors do and went out for a celebratory drink. Then a funny thing happened in the bar. At first Sophie was playing defense but then understanding stepped onto the stage.
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Good news from Baltimore. Amanda has found a job and she not only gets paid, she enjoys the work. Just as things were at their most dire and she didn’t know where to turn she decided to give a new job a try. It pays and she likes doing the work. Now she’s getting out of the house and making money. Find out what her new employment is and read today’s blog, A Woman Finds Her Niche.
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