Today a reader asks Amanita how to handle coming out as transgender to a longtime friend. The friend has made transphobic statements from time to time and the reader is afraid that when they come out they will be rejected. See what Amanita counsels in this edition of Ask Amanita.
The Keystone Conference has been cancelled. To some that means that an annual transgender event won’t be happening this year to to the COVID-19 epidemic the nation is struggling with. To some the cancellation won’t mean much. Just another event that was shut down out in a effort to check the spread of the virus. But to Sophie and the near 1000 people who were planning on attending the conference is not just another event. For some it’s a refuge from the stress of living a life in which they can’t express what they feel inside everyday.
Memories. Misty water colored memories. Not of the way we were but memories of the way Katherine Diaz, our Columbian correspondent, use to be. Also memories of her journey from a “trans de closeth” a closeted crossdresser, to where she is today, an accomplished drag artiste who has performed on stage, done presentations on crossdressing and drag in front of academic audiences, and is totally comfortable with her life.
Our correspondent from Thailand has been out of that country and doing some traveling. She has filed a blog with us about what she, and a longtime friend talked about when they got together recently after not seeing one another for a long while. Both of them crossdress when they are able and both find it easy to present as male when needed and as female when they want to. After their conservation about their life’s journey Christine came to a conclusion about one thing she has found to have always been part of her life.
Claire Hall is a county commissioner in Lincoln County, Oregon. She was first elected to that position in 2004. She transitioned on the job about two years ago. Now she is faced with a campaign to keep her job for a fifth term. Two people with no government experience have decided to run against her, and while she is confident that her record will assure her of a win she is noticing a rise in the amount of people on social media who are starting to say nasty things about her.
Dear Amanita, When I hear other trans women talk and write about their past, I often wonder: Did I used to be a boy or have I always been a girl? I have only found out that I’m a woman five years ago. Does this mean, I used to be a man? Or have I […]
Our newest Contributor is Brooke Preston. Miss Preston today presents a story that we are sure many of you can relate to. It’s all about how excited she was to be home alone with her mother’s corsets, bras, dresses and heels. How she was terrified that her mother might notice a cosmetics item or piece of jewelry slightly out of place the next time she was in her bedroom sitting at her vanity. Now Brooke is all grown up and she can indulge her passion for feminine finery any time she wants. Today she, while immaculately attired in the height of femme attire, writes about the thrill of it all.
An older trans woman, retired and not on any schedule, gets up one morning and between her bed and the coffee pot she revisits her youth when she was a male sailor assigned to the SeaBees and one day she met her first love. They became roommates and while they remained platonic the were together until her roommate left the service. The story is the work of our newest Contributor Jaelle Terrell. It is the first story in a trilogy that Jaelle has kindly allowed us to publish.
All humans are not alike. We are made up of a lot of parts and one size does not fit all. Human’s genetic makeup is mosaic, that is, we do not have the same DNA in each cell. So, human are not responsible for being born into a cisgender, binary, rigid culture but we can change the culture. Dana Bevan gives you the science.
Ask Amanita is the spot on TGForum where you can ask questions and get answers from a therapist specializing in transgender issues. Today Amanita is asked about the concerns a trans woman has concerning hormones. Should she start taking hormones? She would love to have the positive effects of hormones but worries about the negative ones, and, if she doesn’t take them how will she be seen by her trans friends? Read Amanita’s answer today and send your questions to her.
As a woman who has been around for awhile Sophie has seen it all before. Today she writes about history repeating itself in the case of a married crossdresser who hides her “hobby” from her wife and family. This person only gets to express her feminine side when her wife and kids are away, or she is somewhere out of town. Sophie sees this person becoming more and more frustrated about the lack of time she has to express herself, but she worries that if her wife ever learned about what she does that would be an instant divorce.
This is Lynda’s last blog for a while. She is taking a break to have her gender confirmation surgery done in just a few weeks. She will be taking bed rest and healing for several weeks after the surgery. (Anyone want to run errands for her while she’s recuperating?) Today she asks herself why she wants to have a vagina. Is she ready for a life-changing step that is this major? Are her reasons for going “all the way” sound? She addresses all that in this blog — and we throw in a few photos of her last social activity before she goes into the hospital.
Why are we the way we are? As Dana Bevan has pointed out in her TGForum blog there are plenty of scientific studies which show differences between transgender and non-transgender people in genetics, anatomy, brain scans and neuroanatomy, and seemingly unrelated behaviors such as handedness. What if the science is used to produce technologies that could be used in categorizing people as transgender or not? Should people like us be “cured”?
TGForum was contacted recently by a cis woman who is married to trans woman. Her name is Amanita and she is a counselor, who after meeting her partner, has specialized in counseling for trans people and their partners. Today she answers a question submitted by Felicita in her Ask Amanita column.
Lynda Martini is caught up in the hustle and bustle of the holiday season. She has parties to attend, including a gala event at the Curtis Center where she wore a gown, Christmas cards to write and, old friends to inform about the big change in her life. Lynda is scheduled to undergo gender confirmation surgery in February so this will be her last column till after she has recovered. Today she writes about those old friends, what she plans to tell them and, on another topic, why she didn’t win the ugly sweater contest at work.
The holiday season can be hard for most people. All the running around shopping for gifts, putting up with crazy drivers around any mall, preparing holiday treats to take to parties — deciding what to wear for those parties. All in all it’s a busy, sometimes frustrating time. Then there is the trans community and its members who can find themselves not given to Christmas cheer when they have been cast out by their families, not invited to the holiday feast. Just because of what they are. Sophie Lynne is not a fan of the December holiday. So rather than write about it she hands off that task to a deceased friend for the last word of the decade.
Today our Columbian correspondent, Katherine Diaz, writes about how she began crossdressing, first dressing in women’s clothing at the age of 16, and then growing and developing her transformation skills. At one time she denied her feminine side but after the experience at 16 she dressed more and more, learning over the years and meeting other trans people who helped her to experience what she had only thought of as dreams and fantasies.
One of Claire Hall’s friends said “Performing our identities can be tiring.” That made Claire start to think. Wasn’t all of life filled with performance? Weren’t we one thing to some people and a different variation of ourselves to other people? We may all be wearing masks but in Claire’s case she has found that since she came out as her true self the mask fits.
Dana Bevan talks about the effects caused by the burden of secrecy that many transgender people take on in an effort to keep others from learning about their true selves. That burden uses mental resources and the behavior that trans people engage in while trying to stay hidden has a cost. Dana writes about the benefits of being authentic. Even if it’s only part of the time expressing your true self will make you feel better.
Lynda writes a lot today covering her plans for the holiday season, the effects of taking hormones, how she feels about her scheduled gender confirmation surgery, what sort of life partner she is drawn toward, and what it’s like being an older lady at a younger queer women’s event. It’s pure Lynda Martini seasoned with some good old ‘80s rock. Check in today and see where Lynda is at on her gender journey.
Of course the title of Sophie Lynne’s post today is a bait and switch. Sorry, not sorry. (Stole that from Reese’s.) It was just a ploy to get you to read her thoughts on being the last girl on campus for the holiday season. Give her post a read and send her your holiday greetings in the comment area. Show the lady some love! And, she does at least mention bras at one point.
Since her transition Claire Hall’s life has been good. But she also looks back on the years she kept her true self suppressed and mourns for the little girl who didn’t have the chance to grow to a teen and then become a confident young woman. Those past selves only existed inside her head. Read her thoughts in this post.
TGForum was contacted recently by a cis woman who is married to trans woman. Her name is Amanita and she is a counselor, who after meeting her partner, specialized in counseling for trans people and their partners. Today she introduces herself and asks for people to send her questions which will make up her future […]
Many times people find a place where they can go. Where everybody knows your name. No, not Cheers. The LGBTQ establishments where those who society looks upon with a biased eye can relax, have a drink or two and be among others who know what it’s like to not fit in to the straight world. For Sophie Lynne such a place was The Raven in New Hope, Pennsylvania. The place recently closed and Sophie writes about what it meant to her.
Our lady out and about, Lynda Martini, files a report on her latest adventures. From meeting a guy who she clicks with and going on dates with him, to attending a lesbian happy hour mixer with her bestie, Lynda is on the move in the Philly social scene. Give her latest report a read for insights into what life is like for a trans lady on the move.
