Christy Lewis blogs about taking chances. Whether it’s leaving a relationship to go out on your own, trying something in life that you may not be totally suited for, or finally making a move to be who you really are, sometimes staying safe is not a good option and it can pay to take your chances.
Rabbah Rona Matlow has served in the military and now counsels vets who served in Iraq and Afghanistan. As the U.S. works to get all American citizens, coalition partner’s citizens, and Afghans who worked with the U.S. out of the country Rabbah Rona has some thoughts about not just the end of this conflict but of all wars.
This post originally appeared on TGForum in December of 1997. It is by former contributor Jami Ward and is her answer to people who asked her what being transgender felt like. What’s it feel like to have brown eyes? After thinking it over for some time Jami came up with an answer she shared with TGF readers.
Sophie reflects on the death of her friend Lisa as Lisa’s birthday nears. She would have been 60-years-old on August third. No one knows why she took her own life. Not even her friend Sophie. All she knows is that she misses her friend and Lisa’s birthday turns up the memories Sophie carries with her.
When Char came out to her boss as a trans woman he listened to her story then looked her in the eye and told her that he could support her during her transition but she had to “own it”. At the time Char didn’t have a firm idea of what that entailed but now she knows what it means and shares it with you in this blog.
Rabbah Rona Matlow points out that many people who consider themselves to be Christians fail to follow the words of Jesus. He said to love God first and after that love your neighbor as you love yourself. So many find justification in the Bible to allow them to hate, senselessly. Listen to what the Rabbah advises.
Our Retro Rerun comes for 1996. Julie Freeman was a significant other who was active in the transgender community for many years, particularly with the significant others and couples groups. She wrote this article about the importance of self-esteem, the self-esteem of the crossdresser’s partner.
How many times has your desire to wear women’s clothing made you anxious and obsessed? How often have you seen a woman wearing a certain shoe, or a dress that you can’t stop thinking about? Many of us have been there. Sometimes to the point at which the attraction to feminine clothing interferes with our daily lives. Kandi Robbins has been there. Done that. Today she writes about what it was like suppressing her feminine desires when she was in the closet.
Chrissy Gann writes about the loving relationship she has with her partner. It is not alway easy and there is sometime conflict but in the end they compliment each other. Chrissy knows that if she hadn’t come out and transitioned she would have never met her partner.
Sophie Lynne lost a friend a few days ago, someone who was very active in her local support organization and was very comfortable relating to the world from a feminine place. But she was not out to her family, meaning a friend from the trans community had to go to her home and clean out all hints that a woman was living there. Sophie’s friend will be laid to rest as a male and her friends from the community won’t even know that name. Sophie writes about how that feels.
Christy Lewis feels as if she has been enclosed in a chrysalis, slowly transforming into the beautiful butterfly she was meant to be, and now she has broken through the confining wall. Now she’s living her life as she always wanted, being “out” to all her friends and coworkers.
Claire Hall knew that the number of transgender people who contemplate suicide is as high as 90 percent. She thought she would be one of the ones in the 10%. And that was true for a good while. Then pressures from her job, tension caused by the pandemic, and personal troubles like a car that died suddenly all conspired to send her to the the ER, and then into counseling for depression that had paved the way for suicidal thoughts.
Chrissy Gann has always identified as a trans lesbian. For many years she didn’t admit it to herself. But, after many failed relationships and addiction to lesbian pornography Chrissy decided to embrace her truth and be the person she always knew she should be.
One day Char realized that she was holding herself back by continuing to believe labels. She had spent years attempting to fit in and in doing so caused pain to herself and those she cared about. Now she refuses to fit into “Any”, other construct. She’s one of a kind and happy.
Today Lorraine Anderson goes under the clothes and discusses the basics. No, today’s Occasional Woman blog is not about lingerie. It’s about that which we display our clothing on—our bodies. Lorraine feels that no matter how well dressed you are, if your posture is not good you won’t look good. We can sum it up in three words—stand up straight.
Humans have a tendency to build walls. Not just the walls of the city that are meant to keep out the barbarians. We mean mental walls. Walls that cut us off from other people. Often self imposed because we don’t think others will approve of us if they know who we really are. Pauline Estelle writes about walls and has some ideas on how we could tear them down.
There is a saying about beer. You don’t buy beer, you rent it. Today Coach Char points out that all we own and all we are is only on loan to us. She feels that the transitory nature of existence should make everyone grateful for everything while we have it.
Christy Lewis finds similarities between her life and Dr. Richard Kimble in The Fugitive. While discovery and exposure as a trans person wouldn’t have landed her on death row there were countless bad things that could happen if anyone discovered her secret personae. The Fugitive ran for several years and eventually there was a finale in which the real killer was found and Dr. Kimble was able to live his normal life. Christy set herself free and now feels that she is living her normal life.
Rabbah Rona Matlow writes about the continuing killings of Black and brown people by law enforcement and finds a link to the radical views of some Christian sects. What faith do those who do these shootings follow? The Christian Bible has clear statements that say killing people is a sin. Are some Christians misinterpreting the Bible or maybe they’re not getting the whole story?
Trans women long to have bodies that fit them and that means they want to have breasts. Very often HRT produces lovely results, depending on their genetic heritage. Others feel they need to enhance what they’ve grown and opt for implants. In either case, as long as HRT is going on it’s important to take care of you new breasts. Especially if breast cancer runs in your family. Claire Hall recently went in for her first mammogram and in this blog she shares what that experience was like.
Right now there are transgender hikers walking the Appalachian Trail. Armed with GoPro cameras and internet connections they are documenting their long, long hike. Dana Bevan would like to be out there on the trail as well but the results of a trail accident two years ago keeps her from taking off on the AT for New England. She does have advice for transgender hikers and shares it with you here.
Chrissy Gann enjoys the benefits bestowed by estradiol. She is happy with her breasts and general feminization. There are other effects though that don’t thrill her as much. Today she blogs about her hormone use and tosses in some opinions on other areas of trans life.
Don’t you just hate those people who open their eyes in the darkness of the early morning, singing and being genuinely cheerful and simply happy to be alive? I wake up next to one of those people every morning, my amazing wife Bless. Our chihuahua, Marlee, is journeying through congenital heart disease and being older, […]
Sophie writes about the manner in which the pandemic has affected her and other trans people. She wonders how bad it might have been for her if the pandemic had hit while she was still in the closet, dressing only once a month for events that would have been canceled by the virus.
Christy Lewis wonders today about how things would have turned out in her life if just one or two things had been different. WIth just one small alteration her life would have been a lot different. She would have been born a cisgender female. But on the other hand, what about the lessons learned and skills practiced in her current life as a trans woman? Read on for her conclusion.
A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. Don’t judge a book by its cover, and it’s what’s on the inside that counts. Claire Hall has been the victim of name calling and allegations that she is only concerned with the trappings of womanhood. The glamorous surface of perfect hair and makeup. The meanness didn’t hurt her, it made her realize that she knows who she is and the surface is just one part of her whole self.
