Ray Dandelion is a teenager living in Northern California. He is working to help LGBT+ youth become more accepting of themselves and fully understand who they are. Ray’s main goal is to educate parents of LGBT+ youth on what their kids are going through from his own perspective and what he sees happening with the many people he has met throughout his journey. Here Ray offer advice to young people about coming out as trans.
Julie Gaum is 91. She’s been crossdressing since she was 15, after an earlier incident at age 7. Now she has written a book to share her story with the world. The book is called “Never Climbed His Mountain.” On TGF Julie tells her story. She graduated from Wharton, went to Hollywood to work in the film industry and had various adventures. All while staying “in the closet.” After moving in with an accepting female cousin Julie began to dress at home. Then tragedy struck and Julie had to find another home. But she also found the freedom to dress in public.
Amanda has been in northern California for two years. While there are many things she enjoys about the region there are many things that she doesn’t like. It’s expensive, crowed and it’s hard to connect with other people. On the other hand it’s close to gender reassignment surgeons. The weather is good for much of the year. But there aren’t enough hugs. Family and old friends are thousands of miles away. Oftentimes she wonders why she is still there. Holiday time makes it all worse.
Linda embarks on a quest for advice she can give to crossdressers about “coming out” and letting others in their lives know about their dressing. Trans women, at some point, must let their employers, friends and families know that they are changing their gender presentation. Crossdressers can keep their secret and adopt their male persona for the majority of their social and work activities. While keeping your crossdressing secret can feel like you’re a spy and give you an adrenaline rush when you successfully return to your headquarters after a mission (shopping trip or visit to a trans-friendly watering hole) hiding a large part of yourself can cause problems. See how Linda’s friends have “come out.”
Katherine Diaz has sent us another video about trans life in Columbia. This one is called Princesas de la Noche — Fue un Sabado en la Noche. Katherine tells us about a new place her my city where many trans girls go on a Saturday night. She also fills us in on the “tranxtienda” where many Columbian trans girls first venture out of their homes. The text of this post is en español.
When you start living your life as your true-self and announce to everyone you know that you are trans and proud of it you will encounter several types of reactions among your family, friends, co-workers, and acquaintances. Emily O has come out and to help you identify the various types she has made a list of the ways people took her revelation. She has assigned them labels and lists them here so you can keep an eye out for them when you decide to come out.
Our Correspondent from Thailand, Chriatine Burr, files an article with her feelings about why we are seeing more and more older trans people. We have seen a rise in the number of children who identify as trans but there are many older folks who are coming out. Christine puts it all together and offers some reasons why we are seeing this increase in elder trans people.
Today in her personal blog Amanda talks about her day to day routine and what the possible causes of her anxiety might be. She feels that one of the big things is uncertainty over pursuing reassignment surgery. Should she go for it when she has anxiety? Is surgery the right path to take? While she feels daily anxiety she feels she is not operating at 100% — and that causes her more anxiety. What she would like to be is far, far away, flying above the fray.
Several years ago it was a suggestion from Sophie’s wife that lead her to break down the wall that sealed off her feminine spirit. Her wife suggested that they go to a Halloween party with Sophie as Lois Lane and her wife as Clark Kent. It turned out to be the suggestion that turned Sophie’s life upside down and lead to her transition. That’s why since that fateful All Hallow’s Eve the holiday has had even more of a special meaning for her. Read all about her relationship with the Holiday and wearing costumes in today’s post.
Julie Gaum is 91. She’s been crossdressing since she was 15, after an earlier incident at age 7. Now she has written a book to share her story with the world. The book is called “Never Climbed His Mountain.” On TGF Julie tells her story. She graduated from Wharton, went to Hollywood to work in the film industry and found herself romantically involved with a Hungarian woman while Julie collected more women’s clothes in secret. She left Hollywood to work for a home improvement chain in Canada and logging many miles on the lonely road. Then she reconnected with the widow of her cousin and the two decided to move to Florida together. Things were looking up.
Marc Mitnick,MS, CCC-SLP, is a speech pathologist practicing in the South Florida areas of Broward and Palm Beach Counties. He is blogging with TGForum to provide information on how to successfully, without damage to the vocal cords, achieve the voice that matches your gender identity. He works with both FtM and MtF trans people. Today he provides an overview of how speech therapy can work for you and how to find a therapist in your area.
Julie Freeman is a significant other has been active in the gender community for over 20 years, particularly with significant others and couples groups. She has written articles for many publications including the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter among others. The following piece appeared on TGForum in 1996 and was first published in the Diablo Valley Girls […]
Linda has a deal with her wife that allows her to take off for an entire week, go to some resort she finds interesting and spend the whole week en femme, 24 hours a day. She calls these times her “Wonderful Weeks.” After recently spending a week at a resort in Massachusetts’s famous Berkshire Mountains Linda looks back on the feeling of relaxed acceptance she experienced from the people encountered.
Dr. Dana Bevan has been unpacking and refuting the “report” by McHugh/Mayer in The New Atlantis that right wing media sites are now using as proof that being transgender is not real. Dr. Bevan has pointed out the errors in the author’s thinking, whether they are (as they seem to be) intentional, or result from poor research. Whatever the author’s intent we must conclude that their “report” is a political document meant to dismiss the reality of our lives. Even the staff at Paul McHugh’s former employer, Johns Hopkins, have issues a statement saying the “report” is full of errors and is unscientific. Read what Dr. Bevan has to say in her final blog on the McHugh/Mayer report.
There are all sorts of words for it; getting read; being clocked; being made. They all mean that while we are out in public someone has looked at one of us and said, “That’s a man.” Most of the time they try to be discreet as they nudge a companion to point us out. Sometimes they proclaim their discovery in a loud voice. Whenever it happens it’s painful. You try to do your best to fit in as just another lady but there is something that is giving your gender status away. Sometimes you just want to run home and hide in the closet. Today Cate O’Malley has another idea. Give her a read and see what you think of her response when she gets read.
This is a TGF Retro Rerun from Diane Hutchinson. It originally ran back in the late ’90s. See if you can find some of the 1990s references. Diane wrote about passing tips for doing so. Cate O’Malley’s post today gives her 21st century take on passing so we decided to run Diane’s post from the 20th century. They differ, of course. Diane’s advice is still good for those who want to blend in with the other women in a store, or restaurant. And she and Cate both agree that in case you don’t pass it’s best to not let it bother you. It’s not your problem. So return with us now to those days in the late 20th century and give Diane’s Retro Rerun a read.
To some people a car is just a method of transportation. They don’t name it, or give it a gender identity. They just keep it running and trade it in after a couple of years. Other folks look at their cars as more like a friend who is with them on the journey of life through all its twists and turns. Along with sudden stops. Amanda has had Maxx in her life for many years. He moved her from Pittsburgh to South Carolina and then all the way across the country to the Bay Area. But Maxx is no longer young. His calipers tend to squeal and his gaskets aren’t as tight as they used to be. Maybe it’s time for Amanda to consider getting a new friend.
What do you do when the path you have chosen, the path you must follow, takes you to territory that hurts? Takes you to a place where abuse and disrespect are common treatment and there is no, or very little relief. Our dear Sophie Lynne took the path she had to follow and it lead her to that place. A place where her family stepped away from her. A place where crying herself to sleep was the norm. She tried and tried but there was pain. So, she made a plan. A plan for a solemn morning in the peace of Valley Forge Park. But, when that morning came and she was there, alone with the pre-dawn wildlife and her thoughts — she let go of her plan.
Falecia keeps her totally en femme self indoors but goes out and about to run errands in an androgynous mode. She and her wife have an understanding about the extent of Falecia’s crossdressing. It only goes so far and it doesn’t go out the door in a dress and high heels. Today Falecia muses on what might happen if she did begin to present herself to the world as a woman. Would she be drawn toward bigger changes in her life? Would she want to be a woman 24/7? See what she decides about that question in this post.
Julie Gaum is 91. She’s been crossdressing since she was 15, after an earlier incident at age 7. Now she has written a book to share her story with the world. The book is called “Never Climbed His Mountain.” In the last chapter of her story she graduated from Wharton and went to Hollywood to work in the film industry. Then she found herself romantically involved with a Hungarian woman while Julie collected more women’s clothes in secret. At the end of Chapter 3 she was working for a home improvement chain in Canada and logging many miles on the lonely road.
Occasional contributor Kristina Mayhem has sent us an article about self confidence. Aside from the way you look when you are presenting as a femme person one of the biggest assets to being accepted as one is self confidence. If you walk with a confident air that says you have every right to wear that dress the only looks you get will be appreciative. If you act timid or nervous you will draw unwanted attention as those around you wonder why you are acting that way. Kristina has a list of confidence builders you can use to help you boldly go wherever you like as a self-assured, confident woman.
Marc Mitnick writes about the new federal civil rights rules that protect a trans person’s right to transition. In the past health care providers have been turning away trans patients or treating them badly. Now with new regulations from the federal government any health care providers who receive federal money to subsidize their services must no discriminate against patients who fall into several categories, including being trans. Marc has all the details in his post today.
(Philadelphia, PA) – There is a popular conflation of homosexuality and transgenderism that is both inaccurate and can lead to misunderstandings about transgender people, according to transgender surgeon, Dr. Sherman Leis, founder of the Philadelphia Center for Transgender Surgery and a pioneer in the field. Dr. Leis notes that Transgenderism relates to gender identity while […]
Canadians have the advantage of getting their healthcare taken care of by their government. There is no need for health insurance in Canada as each citizen has government paid healthcare. But, and you knew there just might be a “but,” trans people in Canada can get their GRS covered — and nothing more. The government plan does not pay for removal of testes, hormones, breast implants, trachea shaves or voice surgery. Linda Jensen tells the story of one woman, along with several comments from other trans women, and lays out the case for the health plan to cover more.
