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What’s the worst thing you can say to a crossdresser?

| Nov 17, 2008
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Ronnie RhoOr a transsexual. Or even a drag queen. And it’s definitely not something you’d want to use on an FtM.

Chances are, you’ve already said it to a friend. And what’s ironic is that it’s meant in the most complimentary way.

It was said to me twice at Southern Comfort Convention. By two really, really attractive t-girls.

“You’d make a really good looking guy.”

Ouch! It’s painful because they’re seeing through, or even ignoring, the feminine illusion a crossdresser is trying to present. They’re denying your selected identity, and forcing you back into something you’re trying to escape, if only temporarily.

Another thing to stay away from? “With some work, you could be hot.”

Yeah, I got that one too, down in Florida. And again, I think it was meant with the best of intentions. A makeup artist and a haute couture shop clerk trotted that out for me, when I thought I was already looking pretty good. But they didn’t think so, and their recognition of potential only served to point out the reality.

Granted, I know there is room for improvement in my appearance. But there are also limitations. Not everyone can afford the lastest fashions, or all the makeup and tools needed for a flawless look. And heaven knows, plastic surgery is out of the question.

But, sometimes it’s nice to live in a little bit of denial, even if just for a night.


12-_31_07_-251.jpgPictures can make it tough to live in that fantasy world. Like this one from Halloween night. All I see is an enormous melon on top of a little body. To be fair, I know I don’t look good in small hair. The bigger the hair, the better for me, because it minimizes my cranium.

But it was part of the costume. And I had to do it. Because we had a theme going.

We were the Friends of Dorothy! (Or, if you are of a literary bent, we were “Gale Force”!)

Either way, five friends and I all dressed as Dorothy for bar-hopping in Cincinnati. Three t-girls and three GG’s. And one guy who didn’t get the notice about the theme until it was too late. (We threw an extra Dorothy wig on him, and call him the Pimp of Oz.)

Thriller?We went to gay bars, we went to straight bars. We visited the center of the city, Fountain Square, (made famous by WKRP), and we tried to dance along with the video for Michael Jackson’s “Thriller”, but failed miserably. (See photo.)

Mostly, we had fun. We weren’t hassled, despite Cincinnati’s reputation as a very conservative city. At every bar we entered, we were greeted with shouts, laughter, and inevitably “I’ve never seen so many Dorothy’s in one place!”

Having the GG’s with us probably helped tremendously. Cincy can be pretty stodgy sometimes, and when you’re around 20-something guys filled with alcohol, the mood can get a little weird, if not downright ugly. (Why are young men so threatened?) But since we had women-born-women with us, it gave us an air of credibility: “They must be doing it just for fun, because women wouldn’t hang around with a bunch of faggots.”

Did I just say six Dorothy’s had credibility?

And best of all, no-one told me I’d look good as a guy.

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Category: All TGForum Posts, Transgender Opinion


About the Author ()

Ronnie Rho has been writing for Transgender Forum since May of 1999. One of these days, she'll get it right. She's been described as the "world's most famous recluse," but only by people who don't know her very well. She is unmarried, and lives in Cincinnati.

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