Holidays!

| Feb 27, 2012
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This month we’ve had Valentine’s Day, President’s Day (in the US), and Groundhog Day (held in my home state of Pennsylvania.) Next month is St. Patty’s Day. April we have Passover and Easter. This week (as I type this) is the beginning of Lent, which means last Tuesday was Fat Tuesday. Holidays all, of various seriousness.

What does that mean to us in the TG circle? Zippo. Nothing.

Why bring them up?

We as a species mark occasions as special. We call them holidays, anniversaries, whatever. Some mean more than others. My wife and her mother take Lent VERY seriously. That means I have the dietary restrictions inflicted upon me until Easter. Some people really love or hate their birthdays. For me, Halloween is my favorite holiday and is when I mark my “second birthday.” After all, it was Halloween when I re-emerged as a woman.

Happy Halloween!

I’m not the only one who marks two birthdays, as many t-girls do the same.

What makes a day special? Something major having happened, of course. We mark anniversaries of major events in our lives, for good or ill. Badly wounded soldiers mark the day they were hurt as “Life Day” as that day they should’ve died, but were granted more life. We mark weddings. I still can tell you the exact day my ex-fiancé left me.

We in the TG community, for better or worse, are women. We care more about little things like anniversaries and such (yes, I’m generalizing and stereotyping, but stay with me.) In general, we tend to be more sentimental.

When it comes to some things, I am very sentimental.

I remember birthdays of dear friends and call them. I mark days important to me, such as anniversaries of deaths, the solstices and equinoxes. And I celebrate important days of my journey as they come along.

Other things I couldn’t give a damn. Christmas? I’ve worked retail too long. Thanksgiving? Hate it.

Someday soon, there will be an important day, perhaps one of the most important of my life. Sometime soon, I will tell my life about my other life — about my life as Sophie. The lies will end. This will be a rebirth of sorts as my life will never be the same. She may never forgive me.

I’ve planned meticulously for this (and I discuss this on my own blog if you care.)

Imagine: No more lies. Sophie in the open. I expect to be thrown out and to continue my journey from there. Hormones. More.

Can You See the Real me?

But what if she accepts me? What if she says “I can deal with this?” That’s the one thing I haven’t planned. My brain is still trying to sort that one out.

OK, back to my stereotyping from earlier. Y’ know, how women are more sentimental and all? Well, my wife is an exception. She is the least sentimental person I’ve ever met. She marks two personal holidays — our anniversary (and Burger King is good enough for dinner that day!) and our daughter’s birthday. She is absolutely pragmatic. Not a romantic bone in her body. Non-religious holidays are a waste. We are opposites.

So when that day comes — how will she react? Will she cry? Or will she just be angry?

I can’t plan for that either.

So when that day comes, there’s a good chance that the night will find me in a bar somewhere, toasting this new “Sophie Day.” Alone.

And red eyed from tears.

We are opposites.

And it’s a holiday, after all.

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Category: Transgender Body & Soul, Transgender Opinion

Sophie Lynne

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https://sophielynne1.blogspot.com/

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