Christine’s Journey 10/15

Christine

[Part 1][Part 2][Part 3][Part 4]

I ain’t settling for just getting by
I’ve had enough so-so, for the rest of my life
Tired of shooting too low, so raise the bar high
Just enough, ain’t enough this time
I ain’t settling, for anything less… than Everything!

Settlin’, Sugarland)

I was sitting in my Mom’s kitchen on Wednesday when the note was received that my blog was due this weekend. Usually by now I have a rough draft laid out. This time with my workload and recent travel schedule (Washington DC, Atlanta, and then Ft. Lauderdale for the Southern Comfort Conference) , I was not so prepared.

I was in Wilkes Barre, PA to help my mom (90) with appointments and errands. Over lunch I again heard, “I don’t understand,” this time supplemented with “I could just scream.” The former, we discussed, the later was ignored. Late afternoon we visited my older brother (lives in a community home), and for the first time he commented that I “look like a girl.” To my surprise my mom replied “maybe he is a girl.” (I’ll forgive the pronoun mistake.) I thought “hmmm, maybe I’m making some inroads.”

Later over dinner, I engaged my mom in a very frank discussion about my life , our relationship, and the future, during which we both cried. My cousins had been talking to her; she was also happy for me that my superiors at work were accepting as well. “Maybe I’m old fashioned,” she said for the first time. The result of all this was some really good progress toward her acceptance of the inevitable, of me. On my 2-1/2 hour drive back to New Jersey, there were tears of joy.

As noted, the previous weekend I was in Weston (Ft. Lauderdale), Fla., for the Southern Comfort Conference. I commented about SCC last week for TGForum. Two presentations however, impressed me for very different reasons.

A seminar and panel discussion hosted by Lori Fox, a workplace gender consultant, and Dr. Oliver Blumer of Out & Equal, addressed “Challenges and Successes for the TG Inclusion in the Workplace.”

New for 2015 is a publication entitled, Workplace Gender Identity and Transition Guidelines. These guidelines emerged from cooperation with Fortune 1000 companies who wanted to fully understand how to best support their transgender employees and coworkers. Approximately 40 pages long, it discusses Company Policies, Employee’s Expectations, Transition Planning, Guidelines for Management and HR, Appearance, Restrooms, and Customer & Supplier Contact. I found some very useful advice.

The second presentation was notable for its passion. I have owned Kathe Perez’s CDs (Fundamentals of your Feminine Voice) for a few years. Although I’m very familiar with her voice , I never sat in on one of her presentations, but I’m glad I finally did. I was very impressed by her sincere interest in our community and her level of personal interaction, via phone, Skype conference calls, and one-on-one training.

My relationship with my children moves along slowly, but optimistically. My daughter continues toward acceptance. Since I don’t see my son to talk to him in person, my therapist wisely suggested I write him a letter, which I did. We now seem to be texting more.

I received the exciting word from my lawyer that the court will rule on my name change on October 27^th, with the official paperwork to follow approximate 30 days later. Lots of paperwork to come for sure (drivers license, property, banking, credit cards, insurance, etc) , but all very very good.

My next blog will be two weeks later than normal, and with good reason. It will address my “coming out party.”

I will be flying for business somewhere each of the next 6 weeks: Madison, Wis.; Orlando; Boston; Cincinnati; Chicago; Tampa, with perhaps a NYC trip mixed in, during which I will see and open up to a number of corporate level Engineering VPs , whose companies I support. My last trip on Nov. 17^th will be to our Maine office to address our company staff. My “Letter to My Industry Friends” will be emailed to approximately 150 of my best customers and long time associates, with another going to my industry’s consultant group with its 200 members.

The closer I get, the freer I feel. There will be bumps in the road I’m certain, as every day from thereon out will bring its unique business and personal challenges. My shock absorbers are ready.

Love
Christine
xo

There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show

How everything still turns to gold
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last

Stairway to Heaven, Led Zeppelin

Tags: featured, Transgender, Transition, Transsexual

Category: Transgender Body & Soul