Wait/Weight Watchers

Over the years, I’ve voluntarily given up my transgendered pursuits several times.  It’s not purging, just a temporary suspension of activities.  For instance, after I got married, I lost interest in my femme side, and devoted all my time to my bride.

But there were also plenty of occasions where the spirit was willing, but the flesh was prevents.  For instance, there have been times when I couldn’t afford to dress up and go out.  So I didn’t.  When ever I move to a new community, I like to get the lay of the land before I “get pretty.”

Almost every time I do put my Ronnie-ness on hiatus, there’s still a desire.  And I tend to get a wee bit frustrated.  It manifests itself in dreams, and in long periods of time online.

Right now, Ronnie is gone, and gone for good.  I’m trying to lose weight, and to encourage myself, I’ve grown a beard.  A full, scratchy, sweaty, hot, ugly beard.  The idea is that as soon as I hit my target, I’ll shave it off.  But in the meantime, the beard stays.  (And no, I will not show you a picture.)

I can’t dress up with facial hair and still take myself seriously, so Ronnie is trapped in the closet until I’m skinnier than I am now. Is this healthy, or crazy?

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