The Occasional Woman “Must-haves”
Well, hello again from Lorraine, a.k.a. The Occasional Woman. The other day I received a notification in my email from Nordstrom; It proclaimed to me that there were FIVE ESSENTIAL PIECES I would personally need, if I had any hope of having a decent and fashionable summer. You know I love these lists, and generally find them somewhere betwixt hilarious and offensive, so yeah, I read it. And here’s what I have to say on the subject!
First on the list was “Maxis” — by which Nordy’s means loooong dresses. This happens cyclically; some poobah decides “Hey! Let’s bring back long-ass dresses!” It happened in the 1960s, with hippie and granny dresses; again in the 1970s, with ugly long skirts and dresses, in sad ‘70s colors, like rust, beige, olive drab and brown…so pitiful. I was pretty busy in the ‘80s, getting married, having babies, so I forget if there were maxis then, sorry. You get the picture! What ho maxis — and for whom do they work the best? I don’t like them, being accident prone — all I need is yet another thing to trip on! Also, those of us who are…uh…under-tall, look overwhelmed by them. I think they look best on taller ladies, but they are swell for those days you don’t feel like shaving your legs!
The next suggestion was Distressed White Denim, i. e., ratty white jeans. As a person of some size, I would not be caught DEAD in white jeans! Or ripped-up clothing — but hey, that’s just me. They look GREAT on some people. They have that “Whee! It’s Summer!” look to them, so go crazy if you like ’em.
The next item is Off The Shoulder Tops. Okay, if you are reading this, you might be a person who enjoys the female look, but maybe isn’t, shall we say, built that way. You just may have rather athletically impressive shoulders. If so, I can’t recommend this style. It highlights a feature you may be wishing to downplay.
Number four is Shorts! No problem there. I love shorts, and think every human should wear them whenever they want to. I’d steer clear of ultra-tight “booty shorts” for daytime use, as they can scream SKANK to most other humans. And if you’re in cut-offs, as I am on a regrettably frequent basis, try to keep the frayed edges at a dull roar.
The last item on Nordy’s list is Graphic Flashes — by which they mean t-shirts and other tops what got printing and stuff on them. Eh. I like some of them, like ones with Prince on them, but do you really need people thinking that your name is either Abercrombie, or Fitch? Again, this one is a personal choice, just try to be moderately tasteful. Or not! Be comfortable in what you wear, and don’t let your clothes “out-shout” you!
Enjoy the summer, whatever you decide to wear, and let’s not let those straps show, ladies!
Category: Style, Transgender Fashion
About the Author (Author Profile)
I am a native Californian who has been based in the Philadelphia area since 1984. My first CD fashion creation was a gold lamé dress for the now esteemed editor of this publication. Since then I have made tons of fabulous frocks and other fashion apparel for the crossdressing and transgender community. Contact me for custom clothing or alterations via email: [email protected] Visit my Facebook page, @alterationsbylorraineSubscribe
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