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Resolutions

Sophie Lynne | Jan 2, 2012

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It’s the end of the year, and once again I am faced with the challenge of reviewing the past year and seeing if I can make the next one better. Resolutions? I don’t make them, as I never seem to keep them. Well, sometimes. More on that later.

My friend Tammyrae said on Facebook that her resolution would be to help more people next year. (She helped many this year. That’s the kind of amazing person she is.) It reminded me of a scene from Star Trek. (Don’t judge me.)

Edith Keeler: “Whatever it is, let me help.”
Captain Kirk: “Let me help. A hundred years or so from now, I believe, a famous novelist will write a classic using that theme. He’ll recommend those three words even over “I love you.”

So Kirk knew the strength of those words.

Back in the ’80s, I was a volunteer EMT/P. That’s Emergency Medical Technician/Paramedic for those who don’t like acronyms. I helped people in homes, car accidents, all kinds of places.
As my college major, I chose education- knowing full well I would never be rich.

I chose a life of service. I’ve done my part, right?

So what have I done lately?

I talk a good game with my liberal politics. And for the past few years, I’ve dressed like the woman I believe I am, and lied about it to everyone.

My point (you knew I’d get there eventually, right?)

I now walk in circles with people that NEED help. On Facebook, I saw four different friends who were alone on Christmas night. One had Pork roll for Christmas dinner. Another sat home alone and drank herself to sleep. On my “other” Facebook, one person threatened suicide (he was taken to get help.)

I couldn’t help but think — how could I help them? CAN I help them? SHOULD I help them?

Well, if I want to get Biblical, in Matthew 25:40, Jesus says “And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”

So there’s that reason. Then there’s the whole “do the right thing argument.” Opposed is the “Mind your own business” argument.

Do the RIGHT thing. I lie to my wife and friends about who I really am. Is THAT the right thing?

I chose a life of service and was THAT the right thing? I’m unable to afford the surgeries I would need. Or the school that would help prepare my daughter for her future.

I was born male. I wear dresses and a bra.

A life of regrets. One that is shared by many reading this.

“Let me help.”

We as a group spend more time tearing each other down than helping. “OH, SHE’S not trans!” “Look what she’s wearing!” “Bitch!”

According to statistics from the National Coalition of Anti-violence Programs, Hate murders against us increased 23% from 2009-2010. And I’m betting it went up this past year.

75% of transgender men and 20% of transgender women did not receive needed medical attention for their injuries. 61% of survivors experienced indifferent, abusive or deterrent police attitudes.

“Let me help.”

I’m not going to tell you what to do. Isn’t my place, nor is it my style. You do what you want.

I’ve heard that Mahatma Gandhi said “We must be the change we want to see in the world.” So I have two New Year’s Resolutions this year:
1) Stop the lying to my wife.
2) Help others
It’s going to be one hell of a year. And I hope you’re along with me to read about it.

Have a peaceful new year. Be well.