I Enjoy Being a Girl

Having been both a boy and a girl, I can tell you that being a girl is so much more enjoyable. Of course, I cannot say that I’ve been a genetic female — that is obviously something I will never know anything about. But culturally at least, perhaps I can claim to speak with some authority on this subject, having lived this way full time for almost two years.

Peggy Lee

There was a wonderful song with the same title as this article, performed by Peggy Lee in the 1950s. As a period piece, it’s quite enjoyable, and no doubt spoke to the women of the time. And for the TGForum readers of today, we have the ability to enjoy the song from both vantage points, some of the lyrics follow.

“I’m a girl and by me that’s only great / I am proud that my silhouette is curvy.” On a sunny day, an occasional glance at my shadow, or a glance at my reflection in a window very pleasantly says “female”. Prior to transitioning, my nondescript buzz cut, straight shape, graceless body motion and unmemorable attire provided no occasion for notice or discussion — nor would I have expected it to.

Today, my longer hair, softer dimensions, attire, accessories, makeup, nails, posture, etc. are all highly visible by nature, and serve as expressions of individual style as well as conversation starters. I’ve actually made new friends and acquaintances by simply placing myself in the general public, and being open to live interaction. The way women relate to me — friends, colleagues, neighbors or casual strangers — makes clear that they appreciate my presence and presentation, which I certainly reciprocate in this otherwise sad, false culture of mandated solitude and faceless “virtual” “reality”.

The dating perspective is entirely different and favorable. As a guy, I almost always felt under pressure to get everything right on a date. And no matter the circumstances, I was never quite sure if my companion was actually interested in me, or if I was simply serving as an exercise in keeping her on her toes socially — like a cat sharpening her claws, or playing with a toy.

By contrast, when I have been respectfully asked on dates as a lady, I am able to choose the setting and the ground rules. The preparation process is quite simple: Look pretty, arrive on time, let my date carry the conversation, and determine whether or not this may be a fun, compatible and attentive person that I would wish to see again. It’s much more empowering and fulfilling. And although I’m now well beyond courtship age, it is nonetheless gratifying to know that I can attract the right kind of attention.

“I’m strictly a female female.” I am very definitely a girly girl in the sense that I love pretty clothes, makeup, perfume, flowers, etc. Full disclosure: I do still enjoy hard rock (a musical genre that is gender bending almost by its very nature), history, the occasional video game, and other such classically male pursuits. Even so, I have happily kissed sports and politics goodbye and good riddance. This doesn’t mean that I don’t have strong opinions, far from it; merely that I recognize that the whole world simply does not care where I stand on public issues.

The Runaways (1979), featuring Joan Jett and Lita Ford. Girls rock too!

So let the men take care of the outside world, to the extent that they ever do. I’m more than happy to worry about what’s inside the home. Creating a beautiful, warm and loving environment for visitors is of much more interest to me than creating a sleek, cold warehouse for showing off my gadgets and possessions. (Sorry, fellow techies, but a virtual background does not cut it.)

“I talk on the telephone for hours.” Well, this is essentially part of my job description as a project management professional at a software company, especially if one accounts for the post-1950s technological innovations of email, instant messaging and videoconferencing — mixed blessings all, to be sure. But outside of the office, my communication habits are now more attuned to people and relationships than before. This involves a conscious focus on listening rather than on speaking, which was always my preference anyway. (Now I just need to make certain not to become a gossip hound!)

“I float as the clouds on air do.” Life is indeed so much more pleasant this way. It is so tempting to think, “why didn’t I do this sooner?” and forget that this would not have been possible when I was younger, for a variety of personal, professional, cultural and legal reasons. I certainly owe a great debt to those who came before me and set positive examples for me to follow. But setting a positive example to others is easier when you clearly and visibly enjoy what you do and are comfortable in yourself.

Admittedly, there have been some prices to pay — in the obviously literal sense of being much more expensive to maintain a fresh daily appearance. (And gosh, but it sure does seem to take a lot longer now to do almost everything.) I’ve lost one or two casual friendships, and I have to be prepared to accept some of the quotidian inconveniences of feminine living and public interaction, which were alien to me previously.

Onsite at work (January 2022).

However, I consider that these real burdens have been more than offset by genuine, tangible benefits. Now I like my appearance, I enjoy the process of starting my day, and I look forward to putting my best face forward in every way. My public interactions take place in an atmosphere of openness and joy, which is widely recognized and acknowledged.

I know now who my real friends and admirers are, because they have openly supported me in many ways. And being back onsite daily for work with my colleagues since September under essentially normal operating conditions has been a huge blessing for its own sake, while helping to advance the adjustment process for myself and others.

So while by age and genetics I certainly fail to meet the literal qualifications, at least by conviction I can freely say that yes —“I enjoy being a girl”. I wouldn’t have it any other way!

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Category: Transgender Body & Soul