Creating a Feminine Voice — First Step

True North Strategies:  Lessons of the Trail

“Don’t go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path…and leave a trail.” –-Ralph Waldo Emerson

By Kathe Perez, of Exceptional Voice

Finding your way among the brambles, crags, and detours on your path in life is made more treacherous without some planning.

The trail before you may seem overwhelming. It’s easy to feel lost as you scope out the vast array of choices the landscape before you offers. But there is a well-worn path that you simply need to start out on the right foot. This article will show you how.

I love the great outdoors. We live near the Rocky Mountains in Colorado, USA, and we have many, many trails.

I thought that connecting your voice feminization path with the wisdom gained from hiking these trails would inspire you. Here are a few lessons from my experience over the years and what I’ve discovered from working with so many of you. These simple strategies are worthy of your attention and contemplation.

Does your voice match your appearance? What have you done to achieve an authentic feminine voice?

Is the path you’re on leading you to your feminine voice?

1. Walking the trail requires the intention to do so: Trails abound. Selecting and then taking the path that is right for you is not a passive choice.

The intention of your voice-training journey is to be strategic. The secret to finding your feminine voice is to have a strategy (or two or three or twenty). You must be methodical. Be strategic in the steps you take toward your goal. The guidance from a qualified professional, like a speech-language pathologist/voice feminization specialist, may need to be a part of your plan. Or, you may choose to work with online programs. Or, you might find our mobile app Eva useful. Most importantly, don’t waste your valuable resources on approaches that don’t work.

Before you spend a dime, do a thorough investigation of all your options; make a plan for your vocal journey. Ask your friends what they did (which is much better than asking them what you should do). Learn about the nine elements of an exceptional feminine voice, create a budget for your voice therapy, and most importantly, try to relax into the process.  A relaxed heart and soul is more open to learning.

2. There are obstacles on the trail: Rarely do we encounter a trail that is void of branches, forks and missing trail-markers. These obstacles are moments of decision and the direction that we take is usually determined by a variety of factors including our purpose, the surrounding conditions and our knowledge and previous experience.

Develop a system for measuring your progress. Are you recording and listening to yourself?  I mean, really listening? I know it’s awful at first to hear the sound of your own voice, and it’s nearly impossible to know what you’re listening for, but with help, you’ll learn to discern the specific elements that make up a voice. Therefore, you’ll need a reliable means of recording your voice. Most smartphones have a built-in player/recorder; use it!

One true north strategy is knowing where are you right now. Make a recording of your voice today. Read a sample paragraph from the newspaper or a magazine. This will serve as your baseline. After you’ve worked on your voice for six months, record yourself again and compare the two. You’ll be amazed.

Another true north strategy is to have clear and obtainable goals and expectations. Many people drive themselves crazy with unrealistic expectations. Changing your voice is going to take time and a lot of work. I tell most of my clients to expect it to take six months to one year (at least) to make the changes they want to their voices. You are looking for authenticity, right? Let’s face it you didn’t enculturate the way you currently speak over night and you won’t become the woman you know you can be in a few weeks or months (although some people I’ve worked with have! Urgh!).

For the most part, people respond very well to having a clear idea about where they’re going.

In deviating from a determined path, we may encounter new experiences, but we also detour from that which lies straight ahead. It is important that we weigh our reasons and the consequences of selecting which fork we choose.

3. The trail is multi-sensory: The movement of our body as we make progress on our journey, as well as the sights we see and the sounds we hear, dominate our experience. We feel the elements against our skin — the sun, the wind, the mist or rain. We smell the wildflowers or pine needles on the forest floor. We hear the sounds of water and wildlife. Even silence catches our attention. We must use all of our senses to appreciate the full impact of the trail.

The final true north strategy for this article is called proprioception. When we speak there is an intricate dance of many moving parts — your lips, tongue, belly, vocal folds and much more. Your skill in sensing these relationships is what we mean by proprioception. As you train your voice, you must learn to sense your voice in your body. Be aware and stay awake!

One final thought: Never, never, never give up on yourself. You can and will do it! The road stretches out before you. Take that right first step.

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Kathe Perez is a certified speech-language pathologist and an internationally recognized transgender voice trainer. She is also the co-founder and co-creator of Eva, the world’s first transgender voice training mobile app. To find out more about Kathe and her voice training programs, go to: www.exceptionalvoiceapp.com, www.katheperez.com, www.30daycrashcourse.com, www.youtube.com/user/tgvoice, www.exceptionalvoice.com, or email Kathe directly at [email protected]. Kathe and Amadhia released the ultimate guided meditation for your feminine voice, visit: www.feminessence.com to learn more.

Tags: featured, femme voice, passing, Transgender

Category: Transgender Body & Soul, Transgender How To