Projecting
Allow me to vent here. This is being written in the lobby of the hotel that is hosting The Keystone Conference. At the conference, I chat and talk with many people. Many from different parts of the country, many different age groups and many that are dealing with all of “this” in various ways. One thing that just fries me are people who tell me what I am going to do in the future. How I will deal with all of this. What road I will take, what decisions I will make.
How dare they! I am not them, they are not me. I don’t have their life circumstances, they do not have mine. How dare they tell me that I will transition just because they came to that same decision. I have been open here in admitting that I am a trans woman. But that does not mean I will become that full time. That does not mean I am at all uncomfortable being a man. I am not at all. But it is disingenuous of anyone who spends so much time dressed, or so much time thinking about it or so much time planning doing so, to say they are simply a crossdresser. To call this a hobby.
I have not arrived at where I am today without a great deal of thought, feeling, consideration, contemplation. I love being a woman. Not a T-gurl, not a trannie, a woman. Again, how one behaves and is accepted in social circles, how one comports themselves may be different than what their DNA might say. But by all measures, until I open my pie-hole, I have been told time and time again by people I have interacted with in general society that they thought I was a woman when they initially saw me. Upon closer inspection, of course, I do not pass muster, but have always been immediately accepted.
So what am I? Who am I? What is the journey I am on? What is my place in society? And whose business is it to tell me what I will do? I have developed a term to describe me, I am “transitioning in-place”. This is as far as it will go for me because I am very comfortable in my skin now. Did it take me a very long time to arrive at this conclusion? How’s about 60 years? Long enough? Do you think that allows me to make my own decisions and reach my own conclusions?
So just accept me for who I am and the decisions I have made to get here. Your decisions and life choices are yours. We may share some similarities, but I am all me, you are all you and please, remember that!
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Category: Transgender Opinion
About the Author (Author Profile)
Kandi is married with two grown daughters. Her wife is fully supportive. Under normal circumstances, she goes out usually three times a week, either to her church, as a volunteer or to do what women do! She volunteers for over 25 organizations and makes no apologies about who she is and has found complete acceptance by the general public.Subscribe
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