Out & About: T-Tuesday @ M4 — Yours to Discover

| Jul 1, 2013
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jenniferBy Jennifer Cinthe Dark

I moved from Vancouver to Toronto and coming from an open and accepting scene and my own place, I find myself in a situation where I cannot dress and feel comfortable. I moved in with family after a difficult separation and subsequent divorce. In Vancouver I had open-minded friends and various venues where I could go out dressed and not have to worry about being judged. New to the Province of Ontario and looking for a place to hangout, as a closeted transvestite/crossdresser, can be a daunting task … that was until I found M4.

The nondescript building in the west-end suburb of Etobicoke in Toronto is home to M4 — a swingers club. The double doors at street level are as nondescript as the building itself — with only the street number as a marker. Wedged between a bank and a pizza parlor, M4 is a private club which hosts a TG Tuesday (every Tuesday) and welcomes a variety of TGs, TVs and CDs and of course their admirers. You can dress there, if you’re shy — or closeted. Best described as a social club, the club offers a safe and comfortable environment for TG/Vs and CDs to get dressed and be themselves. It also provides a convenient place for admirers, be they single gentlemen, couples or single ladies, to meet and chat with said gurlz.

Gurlz and single ladies are admitted free of charge and there is a nominal fee (plus a, one time, membership fee [$10]) for couples. Single gentlemen will have to pay the premium, but still a very reasonable $40(CDN), plus the membership fee.

The M4 bar.

The M4 bar.

The club has a licensed cash-bar with a dance floor and lounge. Amenities include co-ed change room with lockers, showers and washrooms with clean linen and towels. In the back rooms there are private and open play spaces and a “library”/dungeon. The music, via live DJ, varies from Dance to Classic Rock and mash-ups of both. Doors open at 9pm and closing time is 2am — where you don’t have to go home but you can’t stay there.

When you first enter those nondescript doors you descend into the heart of the building and the throb of the music will be your introduction to the club even before you check in at the front desk. The greeter at the front desk always has a smile for you and knows almost everyone by name — impressive considering the number of regulars and semi-regulars who frequent the Tuesday scene. Once you’ve checked in a first-timer will get the Grand Tour, starting with the Bar/dance-floor/lounge.

The disco-lights on the checkered floor along with the hypnotic rhythms the in-house DJ is spinning sets the tone of party atmosphere. Yes it is a party and people are happy to meet with friends and new acquaintances alike. The dance floor, equipped with a pole, is deep, with a secluded backend for some more intimate gyrations. The bar staff is friendly, capable and quick with a smile. The lounge, divided from the dance floor by an open wall, is filled with deep couches and chairs and the far wall has higher tables and chairs — all good for lounging and meeting people. I have met and chatted with an innumerable number of people at the bar/lounge, some nice couples, some sweet gentlemen and the occasional single lady. Remembering that the primary business of the club is a swingers/social club, you will discover that almost without exception everyone has a positive attitude and accepting personality — you’ll find no judgment here.

Moving through the lounge and down a short hallway brings you to the co-ed change rooms, washrooms and showers. You are encouraged to bring your own lock but it is not necessary as all lockers have locks and there is only one Key-Mistress on duty so you don’t have to worry about your belongings… especially if you change there. Simply take an open locker and place the things you want to store in it and lock it — remember your locker number. As a closeted TV I really like the fact that I can enter the club in man mode and transform into Jennifer there (and visa-versa when it’s time to go home again). I have noticed that the gurlz there are ready to lend a helping hand if and when you need one — false lashes can be such a bitch!

Another desk — usually where the Key-Mistress can be found — is stocked with fresh towels and condoms (bring your own lube) and is also the gateway to the back play spaces. After midnight this area becomes strictly “towels only” for gentlemen — ladies and Gurlz are clothing/sexy undergarments optional. Back this way is where you’ll find the play spaces…

The M4 dance floor.

The M4 dance floor.

My first time back here I deliberately decided that I was not going to play and was just going to watch and get a feel for the environment and atmosphere — though I was propositioned (in a polite and courteous manner) on several occasions. I declined politely by explaining that I was not going to play as it was my first time to the club and I only wanted to get a feel for the place… I’ve since been back, many times. In this back room/play spaces virtually anything goes and there are no pros. Anyone found to be soliciting will be thrown out and banned from the club.

Private rooms where a closed door means they’d prefer privacy, an open door with a rope barrier means you can watch the action but not participate, and an open, un-barred door means you can either watch or ask to enter. Even if you are permitted to enter a room (invited or otherwise) it is always polite to ask before you touch or join in any activity. If you do engage in some form of play and make a mess of the sheets as a courtesy pull the soiled sheet and inform the desk that it needs to be changed.

Open spaces include a semi open space where only a sheer curtain blocks the view and wide open spaces where anyone can watch. A little farther along you will find a swing in a corner of a second open play space and around the corner a ‘dark-room.’ The dark room is an open play space but is dimly lit for those who like the idea of playing in an open space but might be a little self-conscious about their bodies or having people openly watch.

Finally the tour wraps up with the library — so called because it is farthest from the music and it is easier to have more intimate conversations. Here in the Library there is a St. Andrew’s cross, spanking bench and ‘pet cage’… oh yes! Kinks are welcome! That has made a big difference to me as Jennifer the Dominatrix.

On the opposite side of the room is a large flat screen monitor displays some porn. Varying groups of people can be found in various states of arousal, either due to the videos on screen or due to the activity on the cross or a bench. Don’t be shocked at what you might find in the back rooms or the library.

Surrounded with love-seats and sofas both the dungeon and TV offer a relaxed atmosphere where you can enjoy the relative quiet of the club — well, aside from the occasional whip cracks and porn star moans — and watch the action or engage in polite (and not so polite) conversation. Again, after midnight, this is a “towels only” area.

Through the final door at the far end of the library brings you back to the foyer with both Gentlemen’s & Ladies rooms and front desk.

Once you’ve had the Grand Tour you are set loose in the club to mingle and enjoy the company of other like minded people. There is no pressure to get involved with anyone or do anything you don’t want to.

On my many subsequent visits I can say I have met a lot of awesome people and some great new friends. Every week is as different as the mix of people … you make your own unique experience each time.

Each week brings together a different mix of people and play scenes. Often there is a theme night so it is not uncommon for a Rocky Horror Picture Show theme or a Fetish-night with bondage, flogging, candling, or body painting demonstration. It is not required that attendees follow themes but it is encouraged.

Some nights guests are treated to Love Shop specials and toy sales. Mistress Lola brings her custom corsets to show off and sell about once a month. Summer brings clothing swaps and make-up demos with professional make-up artists. As with life your experience at M4 will be what you make of it and everyone is different.

Some etiquette to follow:
Courtesy goes a long way in places like this and going with the assumption of hooking up is as likely to get you disappointed as not. Remember it is a social club and getting touchy feelie without an invitation can cause some people discomfort or make you come off as creepy.

  • Always ask before you enter a play space.
  • Ask before you touch or join in any play.
  • Gentlemen are encouraged to offer to buy a gurl a drink and engage her in a little conversation … develop some chemistry before asking if she wants to hook up … not everyone is there to ‘hook-up’ — some just want to come out and socialize, have a drink or 2 and meet other people who like to dress.
  • If you are asked if you want to play and don’t want to play with the person simply and politely say so, don’t say “maybe later” unless you genuinely what to play with them later. Don’t mislead or lead anyone on … they will come back to check on you later.
  • Safe play is encouraged but as it is an adult playground it is the discretion of play-partners to decide what works best for them.

T-Tuesdays in Southern Ontario, M4 is … yours to discover. Tell them Jennifer sent you.

  • Yum

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Category: Transgender Fetish, Transgender Fun & Entertainment

Jennifer Cinthe Dark

About the Author ()

Living in Toronto from Vancouver, Jennifer Cinthe Dark only started dressing after the break-up of her marriage -- 3 years ago. Jennifer is not 'out' nor is she shy -- a juxtaposition to be sure. Jennifer was active in the Fetish community in Vancouver and is finding her way in the GTA. Mistress Dark is a dominatrix -- but not strictly hard-core more of a sensualist. She enjoy the art of Shibari -- Japanese erotic rope bondage. Ms Dark does not consider herself to be straight, gay nor Bi ... but rather Heteroflexable. She writes, draws, paints ... and like any good Canadian kid loves hockey.

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  1. Wow! felt like I was there. If I ever get to Canada, I know where I’m headed. Whew, I need a smoke, LOL!
    Love and respect