Dina’s Diner 1/13/20

WHICHEVER WAY THE BALL BOUNCES

I recently saw an internet posting and a video on Twitter by Kayla Autumn Ward, a trans woman who wants to try out for a WNBA team. It’s a little confusing because there are mentions of Kayla’s WNBA dreams from as early as 2017 but the Twitter video was posted in early January 2020. So it’s sort of news, I guess.

Kayla Autumn Ward before and after.

Kayla has a lot of internet presences on different platforms so it’s easy to find information about her journey from teen boy to married twenty-something man to transitioning woman. Many of the video posts tell her personal story of discovery, coping, suicidal thoughts, and her current uplifted state. One of the aspects of Kayla’s story that I found interesting was that she has many photos and videos of her in the crossdressing phase of her life. As a crossdresser, Kayla was pretty but not much more remarkable than many crossdressers who post photos on Flickr, Pinterest or Instagram. As a fully transitioned woman, now, Kayla is very, very attractive with a tremendous body.

I don’t think I ever saw any old photos of other trans celebrities in their crossdressing phase. (Sorry if this is an incorrect construct in trans politics nowadays – but everyone must have started somewhere.) Caitlyn Jenner, Laverne Cox, Janet Mock…I could only find current post-transition celebrity photos. I guess it’s understandable that any old photos would be kept guarded given their glamorous profiles now. That’s why it was interesting to see Kayla still showing her old photos. In fact, she mentions in one written post that she wants others to see the complete arc of her journey.

But the thing that caught my attention about Kayla’s story was her wish for a tryout with a WNBA team. The WNBA holds an annual draft just like the NBA and it’s difficult for even accomplished women college players to get drafted or make the teams during training camp. So the WNBA tryout idea seemed a little kooky. But Kayla addressed it in one of her YouTube posts saying it was a far-fetched goal but gave her a target and something to work toward. Okay, I can understand that so I’ll give her the pretty woman concession and wish her well on the court and wherever she goes.

THE CASE OF THE REAPPEARING CHARACTER ACTRESS

My cable service includes something called MeTV which is a nostalgia channel showing reruns of series from the 1950s through the 1990s. One of my favorite old shows is Perry Mason, a courtroom drama that ran between 1957 and 1966. This is an era that I like quite a bit as it coincides with the first ten years of my life. As such, it is also the era that defined for me what it meant to be an adult and how adults should look.

Jeanette Nolan

For men, that meant neatly combed hair, tailored suits, tasteful neckties and the occasional smoking jacket for the well-to-do. For the ladies it meant tightly girdled bodies in fitted dresses, stockings, pointy stiletto pumps, carefully sculpted hairdos and theater-grade cosmetics. The cast in Perry Mason shows were great examples of this even as the ‘60s moved towards the mod culture and a move away from many of those traditions.

Having now watched countless episodes of the show, I’ve seen many of the guest star actors and actresses cycle through multiple shows in various parts. I’ve become quite attracted to several of the old actresses who show up in the series. Some became stars later on (Ellen Burstyn, Angie Dickinson and Barbara Eden), some are film figures on a career downturn (Allison Hayes, Attack of the 50 Foot Woman; Julie Adams, The Creature from the Black Lagoon; and Gloria Talbott, who starred in a lot of horror films and westerns). Really too many interesting actresses (and actors) to mention here.

My favorite of the recurring Perry Mason actresses is Jeanette Nolan. Jeanette always played older women although she was only in her late 40s and early 50s during this period. Unlike our current culture when Jennifer Lopez is playing a pole dancing stripper at age fifty, actresses over forty in that era were always cast as matrons, housewives, long-suffering secretaries, and the like. Jeanette’s appearances in westerns (of which she did many) were always prairie women with their hair in a bun, never the glamorous saloon girl. A Google image search uncovers no old cheesecake publicity photos of Jeanette which was almost a given for all actresses of the post-war years. She was a serious actress from her early years.

Still, I find her attractive with a MILF-y sex appeal that hearkens back to those triggers of my youth. In one Perry Mason episode, Jeanette was cast a bit out of her usual type as a brassy dame (as they were thought of back then) in a blonde wig and other accessories of the hotsie-totsie circa 1963. It must have been fun for her to play that after so many staid roles.

Think of it: a wig, some flashy dresses and heavy cosmetics and you can transform yourself from an otherwise drab existence. I believe it, do you?

LET’S GET RIGHT TO THE POINT…

Sexy Fencing has a long history.

…of sexy fencing. You have to be en garde at all times when reading the Diner and I’m sure I caught you unaware of the topic of sexy fencing. Truth be told, until a week or so ago I was also blissfully ignorant of the micro-fetish of sexy fencing.

This is the type of thing that Al Gore invented the internet for, however. Unless you are an aficionado of thrust and parry, most of us never think about the sport of fencing. Now, if you’re like me, you will spend at least the better part of an hour Google searching and following internet rabbit holes of women in various stages of fencing dress and undress.

According to an internet posting, women’s fencing has been an Olympic sport since 1924. So there is an international community of women fencers. And although the protective gear of competitive fencing is not very sexy (though the meshed hood is kind of fetish-y), the women are highly trained athletes and have remarkable bodies. So it isn’t a stretch to imagine some fella coming up with the idea of fencing cheesecake.

Some of the photos I found are of origins unknown, some very strange indeed. Some are of real fencing females in publicity type photos. Some are obviously models posed with some fencing equipment and not a lot of clothing. And one surprisingly kinky photo was a movie still of a sword-wielding Ingrid Bergman in chain mail as Joan of Arc. Sacrebleu!

I concede that crossdressers are not likely to be enticed to wear full-length padded fencing suits and hoods. But it’s always inspirational to find new ways of looking at women, whether dressed or semi-dressed, with or without swords.

CHEESY SEXY

My Pinterest.com feed continues to suggest many strange things to like or share. Lately I’ve been getting a lot of photos from an old British TV series called UFO. The series told the story of a secret government operation to battle invading aliens in the far-off future of 1980. The producers were the same team behind the marionette action series Thunderbirds.

Gabrielle Drake in UFO.

The series ran on British TV from 1970 to 1973. It showcased the cheesy space age set designs, special effects – and most importantly – actresses’ wardrobe that fueled imaginations fifty years ago. Featuring young actresses with purple hair and metallic threaded jumpsuits, décolletage displays by some of the actresses, and certain scenes where the women wore semi-transparent fishnet blouses, there’s a lot to love about UFO.

A Wikipedia entry about the series had this to say about the look of the show: “The [producers] never explained at the time why the female Moonbase personnel uniformly wore mauve or purple wigs, silver catsuits and extensive eye make-up. Furthermore, their unusual apparel is never discussed in the series. Producer Gerry Anderson has since commented that it made them look more futuristic and that it filmed better under the bright lights.”

Gabrielle Drake was one of the Moonbase crew and she is cute as a button in her purple wig and big eyes. She was something of a sex kitten in British productions of the era and there are a lot of daring photos of her online. Wanda Ventham, who played a human female scientist on the show, is a purebred glamour girl – and also the real-life mother of modern actor Benedict Cumberbatch. Of course, Star Trek set the standard for futuristic TV series and the guest starring women as well as all of the Enterprise’s female crew were attractive and presented with much sex appeal. Later on, Buck Rogers in the 25th Century continued the tradition with attractive actresses in more modern ‘80s gleaming Spandex® or sparkly outfits. By the way, Wanda Ventham from UFO is a virtual twin for Erin Gray who starred in the Buck Rogers series a decade later.

Maybe because it was a British series and I never saw any of the episodes, the still photos I saw online from UFO intrigue me quite a bit. If only the future (of 40 years ago now) were filled with purple wigged and silver suited pixies. It’s the kind of thought that – in the absence of any real women dressed in that manner – might make a young man try to create a reasonable facsimile in the privacy of his own room. Some similar motivation may have brought most of us to this very place – here at the Diner.

BEAUTY FOR YOUR PATOOTIE

Everyone likes a glowing backside.

The New York Times reported on a new beauty trend in the Thursday Styles section on September 12, 2019. The article was headlined “Are You Pampering Your Behind?” and covered the growing market for “butt beauty” products. The Times explains the new market by asking “if you want your backside to have the same dewy, post-chemical peel glow your face has after a facial, aestheticians are also offering the same services for your bottom.”

The overall market for beauty care products is over $5 billion. “What we’ve noticed is there’s a boom in what we’re calling inclusive wellness. Basically this includes every aspect of yourself and every part of yourself,” said Emma Chiu, the global director of research company JWT Intelligence. “We’re seeing that we’re embracing every part of our body, and this includes the more intimate parts of our body.”

Enter beauty care products specifically aimed at the backside. Scrubs, peels and oils designed to beautify your booty are hitting the market and finding buyers. Beauty company Arnese is one of the market entrants. The Times reports, “Their newest product is Illuminaughty, an illuminating scrub that leaves an “everlasting glow” and smells like coconut and jasmine, according to its product page. “I was nervous I would come out looking like a disco ball or a stripper covered in glitter but it was the perfect amount of glow,” reads a review of the product on the company’s website.”

The marketing for the products usually involves a little humor to keep the topic of butt beautification lighthearted and un-intimidating. Product names are pun-ny and tag lines are mischievous to entice a hesitant customer to go ahead and scrub those buns and slather them with scented oils. The consultant Ms. Chiu said, “When you’re speaking about intimate skin care you don’t want to be too serious.”

For crossdressers, the derriere is a tough area in that we don’t usually have the rounded plump bottoms of our female counterparts. But judging by online photos, we love to show what curves we have from every possible angle. These new products may not act like a topical botox injection but if you get your tushy all shiny, tingly, and infused with fruity scents, you may feel like you could give Nicki Minaj a run for her money in the badonkadonk department.

Sylvia Wiesenberg, the founder of the Bawdy Beauty product line said, “I want to feel beautiful, but more so I want my butt to fit my face.” I hear you, Sylvia. When I see a beautiful butt I want it to fit my face too.

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Tags: crossdressing, featured, Transgender

Category: Transgender Fun & Entertainment