When Cassandra Williamson’s father was dying Cassandra had not yet come out and was keeping any hint of her true self hidden from sight. She was a manly Marine Corp officer who had a reputation for doing what needed to be done, more like a machine than a person. She was used to tamping down her emotions when she interacted with others but in private her grief over her father’s condition spilled out. Cassandra shares the story of the day her father died.
Many times people become separated from their families. This occurs for a variety of reasons. Oftentimes transgender people either leave their biological family rather than face coming out to them, or, more often, they do come out and are rejected by those who should offer love and support. Today Dana Bevan looks at the idea of finding home in a chosen family.
The week before last Amanda got into her car and set out to visit her mother in Florida. You might think she would have timed the trip for Mother’s Day but she wanted to be there for her birthday — she turned 50 on May 1. In today’s blog she talks about the trip, only mentions her anxiety troubles a couple of times, and concentrates on how nice it was to be with her mother for a few days, very near a restful, peaceful beach on the Gulf Coast. And she describes the birthday cake her mom “surprised” her with.
Many times transgender people suffer in silence and present their birth gender face to the world because they are afraid of what will happen if their families know about their secret identities. There is the fear of rejection and there is guilt for the continuing deception. Often it is only when the pressure to live as their true self gets so great it cannot be ignored that their secret will be disclosed. How do you deal with family? Claire Hall has not written much about her relations with her own family. Today she gives you a look.
We catch up with Amanda on day two of her road trip to meet up in the middle of the country with her mom and younger brother. Rolling down the highway gives a person a lot of time to think about where they are on the road of life. Amanda’s trip is not exception. Amanda and her family haven’t been together for several years and now they will be together for several days as they visit places they saw on a trip in 1982. How will things go? Read on and see what happens on Amanda’s road reunion.
Humans have a great capacity to slide into a life rhythm and make themselves believe that things will always be the same. No change day after day. So things that should be said get put off and go unsaid. Past abuses are swept into the dark closets of the mind and forgotten. Except they are always there. But confrontation over the evils of the past can’t happen when the abuser has left the land of the living. Porja was the victim of a father who worked hard, with beatings and lectures, to make her into a man. A futile task that only brought her pain. Her father recently passed away. Porja examines her feelings about this sudden change in the rhythm of her life.
Sophie has lost a friend. A friend she never met in person but a person who interacted with her on social media for many years and was supportive of Sophie’s transition. Even offering fashion advice and other support. Today Sophie talks about her loss and she has advice on how mere mortals can deal with mortality. Have tissues on hand before you read “For Julie.”
Can trans people really go home for the holidays? They can but do they then limit themselves to the role their family insists on seeing them in? Even if they are “out” to their family do they still have to “tone it down” or be more demure? The holidays always bring stress and if a trans person’s family is just “putting up” with their trans relative can we really expect to have happy holidays? The Artist D has some advice for the approaching holiday season.
There are some areas of life on this world that really need a handbook or “field guide” to help people maneuver through rocky and confusing terrain. One of those areas is how to deal with a transgendered, or gender variant child. Raising a child is hard enough but what do you do when you little boy insists he’s a girl or your little girl says she wants to be called Jack and won’t wear a dress or skirt? Fortunately for the parents of transgendered children Dr. Michele Angello has distilled the essence of 15 years doing therapy with transgendered adults and children into a book. It’s called On The Couch With Dr. Angello and we review it for you today.
