Rules for Looking Real Good

| Sep 3, 2018
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Woman walking with confidence.

Hello, Dear Readers — and a happy Labor Day Weekend to one and all! I’ve been out and about a bunch lately, and was surprised by how many people must not have a MIRROR to check themselves out before they saunter out in public . . . so I figured this was as good a time as any to re-state my Rules for Looking Real Good.

Number 1: Adjust your attitude! Walk proud, and try your best to exude confidence and self-respect. It really shows, and you will have more fun.

Rule 2: Posture is important! Shoulders back, chin up, hips swinging. Not rocking madly, back and forth, but not clenched, either; a nice, subtle wiggle always works well.

Rule 3: If you can’t glide saucily in heels, DON’T WEAR THEM! Get a friend to check your walk; if you’re thinking Palomino but looking Clydesdale, you’re doing it wrong. Practice makes perfect!

Rule 4: NO WHITE BRASSIERES. Please try for skin-color, or something that matches your upper garment. A white bra can never hide, and it screams K-Mart. And I like K-Mart, don’t get me wrong.


Rule 5: NO WHITE STOCKINGS, PANTY HOSE OR KNEE-HIGHS! Unless you are pairing them with a starched white cap and a blood pressure cup m— they don’t look good on anyone outside of the cast of Annie.

Rule 6: Maintain your wigs! If you wear them, and I do sometimes, you must keep them clean and styled, just like you would with hair you didn’t pay for. I saw some recently that called up an image of bird’s nests, and it was all I could do NOT to look in ’em for eggs.

Rule 7: Be attentive of hand and nail appearance. Not saying we all need regular manicures or press-on nails, but we DO need clean, nicely-trimmed talons every dang day.

Rule 8: Accessorize! You don’t need to wear 12 scarves and 9 bracelets, but a little bling pumps up any outfit. Some cute earrings, a pretty necklace — it shows you are pretty, too.

Rule 9: And the most important — HAVE FUN! The best accessory is actually a smile, and it’s not that expensive. That, and sunscreen is always a must.

I wouldn’t advocate anything I don’t do myself, and I want all of us to have the best time possible as we mosey through life. Have a bitchin’ remainder of summer, and let’s all look forward to a fall that is more temperate.

Lorraine Anderson is the woman in charge of The Occasional Woman seamstress and custom costume creation service. You can email her for more information on her seamstress services.

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The Occasional Woman

About the Author ()

I am a native Californian who has been based in the Philadelphia area since 1984. My first CD fashion creation was a gold lamé dress for the now esteemed editor of this publication. Since then I have made tons of fabulous frocks and other fashion apparel for the crossdressing and transgender community. Contact me for custom clothing or alterations via email: [email protected]

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