Dealing With “Horny Ramblings”
It happens in every trans group I’ve joined, people are desperate to make connections. Some know how to do it with taste and some just blurt out their horny ramblings. I politely explain my position and if they don’t comply they get blocked. If they get disrespectful, then I post their name and some of their ramblings to the world. If that makes me ugly to some, so be it. I am the only one who gets to determine who and what I am based on the bylaws of the specific group I am in.
Recently “Norma” a user on the online group Role Models was hit on by other members of the group and she became upset by that kind of attention.
I have pictures and posts of and about me on adult sites, like Fetlife or Transpassions Network because that’s were that activity belongs, and I am known as RachelX on those sites. I do get a bit risqué or political on my private FB page but not vulgar or have, “Hey lets hook up” conversations with people. I try to portray my life as being just like everyone else’s. I go food shopping, walk around the mall, enjoy family dinners, party on the weekends, work, pay taxes, worry about my bills, give some personal insights on current social issues, etc.
This group is called Role Models. That seems pretty self explanatory to me. Behavior like that of those who hit on “Norma” makes us all look bad when regular folks and sometimes their kids, are trying to be sympathetic to our cause or journey, check out our sites, and see nothing but a bunch of horny trannies going gaga over each other’s panty pictures. Or young people wrestling with their own gender issues, looking for answers and thinking there’s something wrong with them because they see that they belong to a community of pervs in dresses. I’m an adult and love adult activities, but I try to keep those activities in venues that are for ADULTS. This is FB for goodness sake, lets be Role Models.
The LGBT community is coming more and more into the awareness of society and the world and more and more under the microscope. We aren’t going to be accepted or supported if we can’t check ourselves in the company of others. (You wouldn’t make out passionately with your friend at a family BBQ in front of your mom and little brother.) Most trans groups post in their rules, “no nudity, sexual pictures, or vulgarity” and I see a lot of people push the envelope over and over again. A role model to me is someone that knows how to present themselves in the proper context, and sets an example to those we mentor or those who want to support our cause. There are parents out there searching the web desperately to understand and help their child who is going through a gender ID conflict. If we aren’t really role models they will find sites like this, read the posts of all the horn dogs hitting on each other and run screaming with child in hand, to the shrink, thinking their kid is a “sicko.” That won’t help to get the proper education and or help for that child.
As role models we should be having informative, uplifting, and supportive comments and posts to show we are educated and respectful of the society we are trying to blend into. Otherwise we are always going to be viewed as “hot trannie messes” or perverts and waaaaay outside the norm.
“Norma” has every right to be upset if she is truly trying to be a “Role Model” and take her journey seriously in a supposedly safe group, while wading through a jungle of, “Hey Baby, love those tities” conversations.
I get dozens of people on the adult sites hitting on me and I love it, then they find me on FB. Start that shit there — and piss me off! I also get a lot of young people who express their admiration and have a few pix of themselves, which I will compliment them on or offer to help them with some makeup tips, etceteras. As a role model I wouldn’t say, “Hey welcome to the group, NICE TITIES bitch!” Like I said, I belong to a lot of groups but only post adult content and conversations on those that are there for that purpose.
Webster’s Dictionary: role model noun: a person whose behavior in a particular role is imitated by others.
Ask yourself, how do I want to be imitated?
Love and respect,
Rachel Xaviera
Category: Transgender Fetish, Transgender Opinion
About the Author (Author Profile)
61 years young, M-F transgendered human, living full time as Female, on Hormones for 3 years. Married for 24 yrs, it's very complicated, LOL! I am into fetish fashion,latex and leather with a bit of lace here and there. I model part time in NYC and work for "The Baroness." (Latex fashion designer.) Tavel for work and play between Philly and NYC. Work as a home repair/handy person, in the trades 30 years. Singer song writer, guitar player performing on stages all up and down the east coast for over 40 years.I have acted in a few small independent movies. Own my own 24 track digital recording studio and I am a "trained by fire" recording engineer. I love to party and dance, basically have fun! Social drinker, and mother nature..... I am currently working on three books, two based on my life and adventures and one piece of science fiction. I tell it like it is, and live my life out loud. Love making friends and keeping them, (in a cage in my basement, LOL!) I also enjoy the SMBD life style, it's a spanking great time! I carry my own weight through this amazing life and expect everyone I hang with to do the same. My life is hard enough to deal with, I don't need any other soap operas, head trips, momma's boys or daddy's girls. I'm an adult who enjoys other adults, conversations and activities. If I think of anything else of importance I'll update this section as needed. Love and respectSubscribe
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Back around 1999 Excite.com had clubs. All kinds of clubs of many and varied interests. I found quite a few “transvestite” and crossdresser clubs on the directory. Joined a few of those clubs to see what they offered in the way of support for transvestites and crossdressers. All of those clubs had photo pages. Most all of the photos posted were of males in panties exposing their male crotch area. So I started my own club for crossdressers and transvestites called TG Cafe. Stated that there would be no nudity or profanity allowed in the club. I posted it the clubs that I belonged about no nudity and linked to the new club url on the posts. A few weeks later received messages from the club moderators that I was no longer welcome to belong to their clubs and was banned from those clubs. In early 2000 AT&T took over Excite.com and took down all the clubs even the helpful clubs that did not have and sexual contents. When the clubs were taken down there were about 350 members of the TG Cafe I moderated. The other transvestite and crossdresser clubs had many more members than TG Cafe.
Oh how I agree with this! What it boils down to is “A place for everything, and everything in its place” When I was very young and came across a mag with lots of contact ads of TVs showing their panties and gagging for dates, my thought was, “Dear God! Is that me in about twenty years time?” Fortunately I eventually made contact with others who reassured me. I don’t decry anyone else’s activities, all are valid, but some of them just ain’t for me!
Great article, Rachel. I enjoyed your perspectives.