Reply To: Hey! I’m New Here!

[Anonymous]

This brings up a fascinating mental scuffle: does society define us, or do we define us? I mean, our biology has its say, true, but humans are far more than their biology (otherwise, we’d be running around naked, digging burrows for shelter, eating raw organics to survive, etc, like other animals). So every day we make conscientious decisions that define just what “I am” really means. Over time, the sum of our choices presents a unique & distinctive individual far beyond the meat, blood, & bones we’re made of. Now, if we accept others definitions or traits as our own, & mimic them, fine–but the final presentation wins far more emotional response than some forensic sketch.

So, ourselves or others? Who defines us? We might be limited in some respects by our nature, but humans can be surprisingly adaptable to suit us to our preferred habitats & social groups. The iconic element of our mental analyses can easily compel a social response–if we present our preferred symbol dramatically. For example, when I present myself as a lovely, amiable woman, I find that males will often hold doors for me, nod respectfully, smile, & talk with a distinct gentleness often uncharacteristic of their nature when dealing with an aged male of wanting circumstances.

So, is this a cut-&-dried reductionist matter of “true or false”? What human being could be contracted to that binary mental condition yet still be satisfied with life? No, sociality, mingling, cordiality are far too savory, delightful, a& enriching to tolerate such restrictions. We simply have too much to live for, to explore, to experience! Rather than settle for what we’re given by nature, we rise & shine! We don our festive colors, trappings, & enhancements, then we get out & celebrate the beauty, grace, & wonder of life, friends, music, & sociality!

Alas, such an enriched, delectable vision & versatility exceeds the capacity of those who insist on clinging to their mental blinders, emotional exclusion, & social rigidity. If that’s the existence a human personally desires, fine–I’d say enjoy yourself, but it still sounds like a living hell to me. So how about this? How about you do you, I do me.

If someone truly finds *my* presence or presentation objectionable, fine; you hang out with your people doing what you enjoy, while I hang out with the general public & associate with them as I enjoy. I’m not hurting or demeaning anybody–there is no authentic social injury caused by my words, my manners, or my socialization. And I refuse to be caged by reductionist fear or hate.

Personally, I define myself; I do not accept anybody else’s definitions for me. <3