Ironic
As Angela Gardner blogged about how much things have changed for the better in the last couple of decades, I was working on a blog about…
…how little progress has been made.
Oh sure, we’re on the cover of Newsweek. Barbara Walters did a special on the topic of TG children. And transgendered youth are winning the right to not only go to school in their preferred gender, but they’re winning crowns at prom.
But what about the rest of us? Is there any progress in the ranks of crossdressers? I still see countless photos of t-girls who are afraid to show their faces. Look through any TG-themed Yahoo group and the blank profiles outnumber any other segment.
For many of us, transgenderism is only about a quick sexual thrill. And then it’s hidden away, discarded because of shame. I don’t visit chat rooms like I used to because I’m tired of the propositions.
And when I do chat, I tend to see the same people. They’ve been living their lives online for years now, and are still talking about the same thing: how much they like pantyhose. Fine, I get it. Can we move on?
The Internet gets credit for opening up a whole new world for us. But, I fear it has also closed us off from the rest of the world. When we get online for the first time, we learn that we aren’t the only person who feels this way. We connect with other like-minded individuals. We learn, we share, and we grow a bit.
And then, for too many of us, we stop. We’ve walled ourselves off in our little corner of the World Wide Web. Crossdressers don’t have to worry about fascists rounding us up and throwing us in prison; we’ve already built our own little ghetto.
I’m not suggesting in the least that we should all cancel our subscriptions to TGForum. (Lordy, no way!) But, I am saying the Internet should be part of a balanced breakfast: we can and should do more with life.
The ‘Net is a tool. Not a crutch.
Category: All TGForum Posts, Transgender Opinion
About the Author (Author Profile)
Ronnie Rho has been writing for Transgender Forum since May of 1999. One of these days, she'll get it right. She's been described as the "world's most famous recluse," but only by people who don't know her very well. She is unmarried, and lives in Cincinnati.Subscribe
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Most of those who stay in the closet and pursue their femme desires through the Web do so because they fear discovery. They’re worried, and in most cases rightly so, that they will be found out and lose prestige, income, or relationships. I came out in a big way when I appeared on The Morton Downey Jr. Show back in the ’80s. At that time I had people who disappeared from my life. Looking at who they were and how we interacted I concluded that they were never friends but only associates. I haven’t missed any of them. The people who counted, my friends, never abandoned me. As far as income goes, that will depend on where you work and who you work with. But, if you go to a gay pride event or a TG friendly club remember this: If you run into anyone from work then they’re gay or TG, too. Also remember that you don’t look the same when you’re dolled up for fun. And the context is different. I have walked past people on the street who didn’t know it was me. Now be careful but get out there and enjoy yourself!
Amen!! I couldn’t agree more, especially about the shame aspect. I’ve found that for individuals who come to fully embrace and accept their TG, the sexual thrill diminishes to some extent. I think that for many, the shame and hiding of it adds to the thrill – that which is taboo is always more exciting.
I would really encourage people who can to get out and explore a little. Go to an accepting club, make some calls and find an accepting cosmetician or nail artist, go for a drive in the evening -drive throughs can be a hoot! Find ways that you can express who you are in a more full expression. Pride week is coming up in many states and cities, have you thought about marching in the pride parade or attending nay of the festivities and representing the transgender community? Turn off your computer and find other ways to express yourself.